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Why do I give my all to you? Do you see how dumb I look. I sure as hell do. And that’s sad. I know I don’t mean shit to you. I know if I left you wouldn’t care. I know that if I need your help you’re not going to be there…yet I stay? Why am I this way? Is there something mentally wrong with me? Do I not want to be alone that badly to where I’d rather feel like a bother then loved? You’re such a shitty boyfriend. You’re such a shitty friend. And I know this. BUT I DON’T LEAVE. WHY. I’m not happy. Infact I don’t even remember the last time I was happy. I cry everyday cause of you. I want to leave so badly. I want to just end this nightmare with you.. But who’s going to want me? I’m not a size two with brains. Atleast you like how I look. I mean, that’s the good things about you…You like me for me. I’m starting to feel hopeless. Dead in job. Dead in relationship. My bestfriend is going off the deep in. If you’re out there God, can you give me a sign. Can you give me something that means good. Everyone says relarionships aren’t suppose to be easy but who knew it would be this difficult…
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